The Things I find

The Things I Find #4

Do you wonder why that sign caught my eye? It was taped to the glass door of a barbeque restaurant in my home town a while back. It’s the town I came from, not where I live now. Of course, I understood the meaning right away. Who could miss the wisdom of warning customers pushed there by winds gusting to near 40 mph that injury could result from daring to enter? I snapped the photo because that sign prompted me to reflect, later, on the choice behind posting that sign.

We humans are choice-making machines. Each day, whether consciously or not, we choose each action we take. Some bits of behavior we choose so often that they become habits. Which shoe goes on first? Chocolate or vanilla? Coffee or tea? For many of the choices we make, we may even justify them by telling ourselves it’s the most efficient, or the only logical, or the simplest (or any other rationalization) thing to do. Posting that sign probably fell in the “most logical” category. But was it really? Or was it simply expedient?

The notion of mindfulness has caught wide attention in the past couple of years. Attempting to be more aware of each moment can certainly prove beneficial. But for me, awareness of choice making is at least as important. This sign brought to mind one particular sort of choice a person can make, sometimes beneficial, sometimes not. That’s the choice to cope, to manage to get through a particular situation without major distress or harm. That sign might be an example of coping. In the face of something that couldn’t be changed (the wind), the poster of the sign managed to keep the eatery in operation and reduce the possibility of harm. Coping has its benefits. It reduces stress in the moment, it can help one persist in difficult times and places.

But in that case,although the paper sign might have dealt with the problem expediently, for that moment, there could be wisdom in making further choices. Install a restraining arm on the door, build an small entry shelter in front of the interior door (a good West Texas choice). preparing for the next time the wind blows could be a wise choice. Metaphorically, wind blows into our lives fairly often. But it’s not necessary to feel defeated by its repeated arrival, to be buffeted about by its gusts. We can make new choices beyond simply coping.

Looking again at that sign, and thinking about choosing to cope, I wonder how often I examine fully the choices I make to cope, and why. Habit? Expediency? Fear?

Have you ever wondered about that? I’d love to hear from you.

It’s not always easy to hang onto the door.

The Things I Find–#2

Here’s something I found on Brain Pickings, a newsletter that is a work of love for its author, Maria Popova

www.brainpickings.org

Each week, she publishes this ad free newsletter filled with all manner of interesting things related to topics of her choice. Links within each edition take the reader to the sources that inspired her comments. Most of the sources are either in the public domain or available through a public library. So although there are some commercial links, this newsletter is designed, not to sell, but rather to prompt readers to think, perhaps to pursue some interest they find in the material presented.

This one caught my interest because of the recent increase in mass protests related to political concerns. It was the opening lines of a piercing poem titled “Protest” by Ella Wheeler Wilcox (November 5, 1850–October 30, 1919), from her 1914 book Poems of Problems (public domain | public library), written at the peak of the Women’s Suffrage movement and just as WWI was about to erupt.  “To sin by silence, when we should protest makes cowards out of men.”

Seeing that the poem was written back in the early part of the 20th century, by a woman, made me wonder if I could ever fully appreciate the importance of our right to protest. Beyond that, I reflected on occasions when I might have “sinned by silence when I should have protested.”  That took me a while as those occasions have been more numerous that I like to admit to myself.

I also thought that the word protest most often calls to mind action by groups, making public statements—marches, petitions, acts of civil disobedience—all of which can produce powerful results. But protest can take other forms. That poet, a female writing during the Women’s Suffrage movement, may have marched in public protest. I don’t know whether she did. But I do know, from reading that poem, that she “spoke” through her art, an important way in which protest can be lodged.

The link above (public domain) takes you to a fully readable, free edition of that poet’s work. “Protest” is on page 154. Once there, you’ll find in her art a strong voice raised in protest.

What are your thoughts on the forms protest can take, the issues that demand protest, and the value of the right to protest, personally, professionally, publicly? Use the comment icon on this post to open a comment window. I’d love to hear from you.

The Things I Find

This is the first time I’ve written a “real” blog post. Maybe it will be the last. That depends on whether there’s a good reason to post. There are plenty of words, thoughts, ideas, photos, and all manner of other diversions available to any who use the Internet. The only justification for my adding to all that content is if I have something useful to say. Because I spend a lot of time writing and reading, I do find things that others write and some that my characters may say or think which might be useful. So the theme of this and any other posts I make here on my website will be things I find. They will be things that give me reason to stop and reflect, to wonder, and sometimes to smile or even laugh aloud. Because I am fascinated by how we humans tell our stories, some of the things I find and will pass along may be bits of conversation (like most writers, I eavesdrop) or dialogue from the things I read. I offer them to you with the hope that my “findings” might do for you what they do for me—make you wonder, reflect, or even smile or laugh aloud.

Here’s today’s. Lucy Moore, a friend whom I admire, has written of her work as a mediator and facilitator in Common Ground on Hostile Turf 

She speaks eloquently of mediation as a process. In the introduction, she offers the definition of mediation that she prefers. Lucy attributes the definition to Peter Adler…”what he does is simply help people tell their stories to each other. Once the table is set, the ground rules are in place, and parties take their seats, the mediator’s job…is to help people express themselves honestly and to ensure that others are genuinely listening.”

What did I do when I found that? I reflected on the times I was responsible for attempting to bring differing sides to agreement on solutions. I wondered if there had ever been a time attempting that when I “helped people tell their stories to each other” or if I been more focused on my own version of the desired solution or worse yet, perhaps I’d told my own story rather than listening to theirs. What are your thoughts? I’d love to hear from you. If you’d like me to share more of the things I find, I’d appreciate knowing that, too.

If you’d like to read more from Lucy Moore, go to  www.lucymoore.com.